Things I wish someone had told me when I was 18...

Just a random list...some require commentary, some stand on their own. All of this is given in the context of a 38 year old me talking to an 18 year old me...

--Go straight to college right out of high school, and finish in 4 years. Get a good all purpose degree like business, history, or english.

This sounds obvious but for a lower middle class kid like myself it wasn't. I had no commitment, no plan, no sense of what the future would require of me, of what it would take to be successful in life, which brings me to my next point...

--If you had any idea how hard life really is, you would get serious and prepare now.

Seriously, I know some people are born with a silver spoon stragically placed within their person. But for the rest of us, using the energy, enthusiasm and fearless overconfidence of youth to accomplish the needed preprations for adult life is essential. Life (unless you come from a rich family and you don't) is far harder than you have been led to believe.

--It is ok to work a job you hate for a time as long as it is a means to an end and not a career.

--Most girls are not sex crazed maniacs who are having sex with every guy except you.

--A girl who might not go out with you because of the car your drive isn't worth your trouble.

--Long distance relationships never (99.9%) work out. So leave that girl from Oct. 1993 alone.

--It is easier to stay out of people's business than it is to get out of people's business.

--Pay attention to people, really listen when they talk. Ask good questions. Care.

--You will meet all kinds of people in life. Sadly, many will perform down to common stereotypes associated with their race, socio-economic class or culture. The L.A. Riots that will come in 1992 will do much to perpetuate this. However, this is no excuse for racism or bigotry. Using common sense and treating ALL people with genuine respect is the best way to live life and will allow you to make friendships with all kinds of people in life.

--Read books that challenge you. Start with the Bible (New Testament), then read books on history and philosophy. Try to read at least one new book a month.

--Travel. Seriously, don't be a pansy. Get out there and see the world. That road trip to Canada that you will want to take with your friend Chelo in a few years...do it! You are living at home, rent free with no kids and no "real" job. Travel during the summer when you are not in school. Remember the previous point about common sense and respect and you will be fine.

--Humility. It is a concept that doesn't even occur to you at this point in life. But as you read about Jesus and see His model of strength and humility, you will see that a real man does not need to go around bragging about himself or his conquests. A real man is humble and grateful to God for all he has been blessed with. A real man is patient with those who are not humble and tries to model humility.

--Don't be afraid to fight if there is no other choice. And don't be afraid to strike first if you are cornered with no other options. Trying to play catch-up in a fight after you have been punched in the nose and/or the eyes is almost impossible. Have confidence. "Violence of action" is the key. Fight violent, fight dirty and fight till the other guy is down and done. All of this falls in the context of common sense, respect and humility. Those three will keep you out of most situations where violence is the last and only option.

--It is possible to have friends who are girls but you, being a man, will usually end up wanting to have sex with them. If you want a girlfriend, then have a girlfriend, but don't lead girls along by being intimate with them. Respect them and their bodies.

--Also, if you like a girl, then man up and tell her. Life isn't an afterschool special or a Foreigner song. If you "wanna know what love is" then speak up. The Bible says that a open rejection is better than a hidden love (Proverbs 27:5). The Bible is full of good stuff like that, as you will see.

--When you get a girlfriend, don't go nuts and get all physical. Sex is great but so is nuclear power and you don't need to be splitting the atom up in your bedroom either. Both sex and nuclear power are meant to be used in the proper way: Sex in marriage, nuclear power in a safe confined setting (hey, kinda sounds like marriage!).

--Speaking of marriage, if you meet a good girl with good values who shares your core beliefs, is good looking and smart with a good sense of humor, likes your friends and family, has a work ethic, is kind and loves kids, has a vision for her life and what she wants to do with it, is humble and self-sacrificing and loves YOU...put a ring on her finger, marry her and love her for the rest of her life because she is a miracle from God.

--Lastly, get right with God. Jesus is the only way any of us get to Heaven. Read John 3:16, John 14:6 and start going to church with your sisters over in Ontario. You are going to go there eventually. God will bless you coming to faith sooner than later.

This list will continue to grow as I think of more stuff I wish I had been told when I was young...